Shark Goose / by Arthur Hsu

Street photography is fun for me partly because I really don't know if I would even come home with one decent picture each day I head out.  The long periods of boredom while wandering around the city could come to an abrupt end when the stars align and something brilliant happens in front of you.  When you start to see the shot come together in front of you, your get an incredible nerdy adrenaline rush!  I can only imagine the sensation being similar to finding that solution to the pesky math problem or when someone lands on your Monopoly property that would result in their untimely bankruptcy.  That single "decisive moment" in photography doesn't always happen on every single outting.  Sometimes what captures my imagination happens over a number of shots. 

As I relish in the intermittent sunshine on my outting, I witness a scene unfolding in front of me that reminds of the movie Jaws or the TV show When Animals Attack.  Before we get to the pictures, I want you to imagine being in a serene city scene like the one you see above.  Now, I want you to play the theme song to the movie Jaws in your head....  Start slow at first...

 

 

 

DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN dun... 

 

 

 

 

DUUUUUN dun...... 

 

 

 

 

 

Dun dun... dun dun... dun dun... dun dun..... 

 

 

 

 

 

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

The sneaky Canada Shark Goose prowls the downtown landscape for its next victim, and when I came upon the hunt of the goose, it was as if I was watching a predator movie.   The Shark Goose glided silently through the depth of the city using its scale-y webbed feet.  Wobbling step-by-step towards the victims like an inebriated waterfowl pirate stuck on first gear.  I was surprised how long it took the people to notice its advances.  When I finally warned them of the approaching monster, they sat there posing for pictures.  Then... BAM!  Shark Goose strikes.  By "strike", I mean... idling in your personal space hoping you would give it some grubs.  After having a good laugh, I walked away from Shark Goose wondering why it was all alone.  Was it so hungry that it had no choice but to sneak up so closely to people?  I worried that the hunter Shark Goose might become the hunted if it approached the wrong person... like a BBQ goose chef.  To prevent Shark Goose's potential murder, I had no choice but to buy some granola chunks from London Drugs, so Shark Goose wouldn't have to sneak up to other people for the next little while. 

As I returned from the store, I thought Shark Goose may have fled the scene.  I was relieved to see it lounging around the area without a care in the world.  I wanted to tell that silly goose that it should never stick around the scene of attack, yet I was glad that the finest bag of granola would not go to waste.  Shark Goose waddle over and started chowing down right away.  A few chunks got under my shoes when I dumped part of the bag on the ground, and Shark Goose had no problem pecking right under my shoes.  It's lack of inhibition makes me worried for its survival, yet I definitely wasn't helping by feeding Shark Goose.  At one point, the sun poked through the clouds for a brief moment, Shark Goose stopped eating and looked up at the sun directly like how a person might look up at the glorious sunshine in appreciation.  We spent a long while sharing the food that afternoon.

Ever wonder about if geese will eat until they explode?  Wonder no more!  Shark Goose and I destroyed that bag of granola.  I think I ate more, but don't judge me!  I am so much bigger and thus require more nutrient!  Eventually, Shark Goose walked a few steps away from me and sat its fat ass down on the ground while facing me.  It eyeballed me for a while and it went to sleep.  How rude!!!

As I looked at Shark Goose's closed white eye lid, I felt a sense of responsibility to stand on guard while Shark Goose slept.  I thought that was what a good goose buddy would do.  I sat there surfing the internet on my phone while the fatty snoozed.  Eventually, a couple walked by and caused enough of a raucous to wake the slumbering beast.  It started waddling over towards them slowly, and I knew my job was done.  It was a wonderful afternoon.